Wednesday, 6 February 2013

Comic For Profit!

Having a place where you can vent your frustration is something I’ve always needed. Thankfully, running Music Review Database means music, music and music. We can discuss the elements of music in every form, even Comic Relief. Forget about all the politics and good will behind this charitable event. If you're in to standard British comedy, then Children In Need and Comic Relief are a great night of entertainment. On the other hand, for those that don't want to see James Corden on TV again, it's a terrible night of meaningless and ill thought out drivel.

We're talking music right, so what's musical about Comic Relief? Well everything from the music selections to 'live' performances. But more importantly, the official charity single. On the ticket it says, 'all profits go to Comic Relief', or something similar. This may be true, all the profits from the charity single may go to Comic Relief, and the only thing that's bugging me is what happens after and what's happened before. And this ladies and gentleman, is what Comic Relief is all about.

The Saturdays, Sugababes, Girls Aloud, The Wanted, McFly, Westlife and Boyzone. I despise all seven of these groups because they release pop manufactured crap. Some of them are still going today and part of that is down to the title of this article, comic for profit. Making money from charity. You could argue by saying they're doing enough just by using their name / image to raise money for a good cause. And I put emphasis on 'doing enough', because all what they've really done is go in to a studio and record themselves singing. Then feature in a music video which isn't funny, and they never are... With a bunch of red noses. For example, in 2009 The Saturdays covered a great track by Depeche Mode, "I Just Can't Get Enough". The single hit number two in the charts and no doubt made The Saturdays even more famous than they already were. Selling out tours and putting their name stamped on an 'official single'. Have you seen the video, which is meant for comedy? Well here it is, watch that. The top comment is what's on every male's mind when watching this video: "Fap fap fappity fap fap." Role models? For charity? No, image.

One Direction is in charge of the Comic Relief official single this year. They will be covering a classic written by Debbie Harry of Blondie, "One Way or Another". One Direction will butcher this single and it won't make a difference. All it can do is help their career, and they know that. Underneath the 'we're all for charity' and 'help people' bullshit, lies five lads with nothing on their mind except money money money, instead of music music music. It will be number one in the UK singles chart, and I will get mad. I always refer to one 80s anarchy punk band when I'm in this state of mind, and referencing them is how I end: Pictures of Starving Children Sell Records.

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